Don't "Test" Yourself If You Are An Addict

Don't "Test" Yourself If You Are An Addict
by
Robin Hall, an alcohol addict


Most of us addicts probably do this sort of thing, try this bullshit. We are in remission / recovering / going to meetings etc. Smokers; alcoholics; heroin addicts; food addicts; pill addicts etc. The meetings are SA; AA; NA; FA or whateverthefuck12stepprogram.

We lie to ourselves or are just dumber than we ever thought was possible. "Well, I am over this shit and to PROVE it, I will have a hit or two," and a week later we know we lied to ourselves. We are hanging over the toilet with mucus dripping out of our nose and mouth almost choking to death. Maybe we peed on ourselves or worse. HEY we tried but now we are fucking alcoholics again and that simple experiment was certainly worth it, eh?

Duh, NOFUCKINGWAY.

Don't test yourself if you are an addict. Tests lie and you are not a good judge of character are you?

Go to the meetings if they help.

Stay away from YOUR drug of choice for the rest of your life.

Believe this particular addict, me, in this one thing: Don't test yourself if you are an addict. I have done the testing. Shit, I have an MA in Community College Teaching so I SHOULD know a bit about testing and I do.

Guess what? I have failed several testings of two drugs. Tobacco has kicked my ass 3 times. I am walking the line for it just now.

Alcohol has continued to kick my ass and the Dean of the Department of Alcohol FUCKING FAILS ME regularly if I take that particular test.

I take it, the Dean kicks my ass, fails me and I am gone till I have been in some hospital or other and am stupid enough to take the test again. And I am that stupid.

Take a fucking hint, NEVER ever do this sort of test. NEVER. NEVER. Trust me once in your life, NEVER test yourself in this.

Later, maybe some other things I suggest might seem useful or interesting but in this one thing, NEVER test yourself.