Party Facts

Party Facts

Over the years I have discovered food facts that may not be startling revelations but do take up time reading about which is frequently why we read. Take party foods for instance. At a party one wife and I had peanut butter with powdered milk stirred in. It was meant to increase the bioavailability of the peanut butter and that seemed adequate for any party. We got this ridiculous notion from Diet for a Small Planet. Oh, the notion was ok but the party part was ridiculous. After the party was over we did not find any of the spread had so much as moved an inch. We had to use it ourselves over the next week. It was a long week.
Then there’s corn. While popped corn is quite festive for tree decoration at Christmas, canned corn is not. Don’t ask me why. I like the yellow kernels myself but a tree strung with them won’t attract many oohs or ahhs. Turn now to caviar. If you have fancy friends and serve caviar it frequently disappears quickly. Some of these caviers are very expensive. If you had popcorn with butter and grated parmesan along with garlic and onion powder next to the caviar, its my guess most folks would prefer the popcorn but be embarrassed to eat it. Caviar is better. Ha! Good tasting caviar is an oxymoron in any language so save your money and serve popcorn.
Now tuna. Ketchup and tuna are not tasty together. So far I the only thing I have found that disguises the taste of canned tuna adequately is Green Tobassco Sauce. Add some olive oil and extra onion powder and you can pretend its something else. Chicken maybe. Green tuna is a party no-no.
How about turnips? What are these for? Cricket? I would guess a party with turnips may not be as festive as you wanted it to be. And which wine would you serve? Ripple might disguise it some. Keep in mind turnips will return to haunt you.
Speaking of haunting, how many of you have experienced the power of methyl mercaptin in asparagus? The bathroom tells the tale here. I am sorry to have to bring this up actually.
This is just a short note today. I will let you know about other party no-nos later. For instance, I was in Russia recently and the music was all Russian. I was not surprised. The vodka was Russian too and after some of that, Russian beer and champagne [sic] the music sounded fine. The chicken was somewhat tough but it was good exercise for your teeth which is something to keep in mind for your guests. They need some challenges. Keep them guessing for a few items. Have good music, keep the spirits high by leaving out peanut butter and powdered milk and be there early if you are the host. No one likes to be kept waiting in the rain.

Copyright 2007 by Robin Hall