Shoot the Rude

Shoot the Rude, a brief rant

One day I was reading a note about a new TV show called something like Weakest Link. The moderator was supposed to be quite rude, but well read.
I forgot about it till just now because I would definitely NOT watch such a show in the first place. Then it hit me. Perhaps we should modify our legal system to include shooting rude people. If Rude Shooting was legal, of course the moderator of the Weakest Link, allegedly the world's rudest hostess, would be undone after she said "Goodbye." to her first loser after the law passed.
My fervent belief is that there are about 50% too many people right now for the planet to support decently and this insane overcrowding causes stress for most. Stress leads to rudeness in many and the new law, Shoot the Rude, would indeed offer a way to reduce the population quickly and efficiently now that major plagues are less effective and the weather service actually tells us when there is going to be a hurricane. What's next, predicting earthquakes? Forcasting wars? The earth could not tolerate the weight of new people that would cause!!
Anyway, shooting the rude could be fun, relieve stress on the rest of us and tame the glut of inhabitants else why is there road rage where shooting of the rude is already in progress but not yet legally sanctioned?
There are just a few problems to iron out like what happens to YOU if you shoot a rude person and miss? Or what if you hit someone else who was not rude? There would have to be lots of discussions on the many fine legal points this new law would entail but I am sure, in a calm enough setting, all will turn out for the best. Maybe rude shooters would have to have a license or take classes.
Oh pooh. Another problem popped into mind. I am not sure we humans are that far removed from the primordial slime to be good and honest judges of rudeness. For instance, what if two people were up for a promotion and one shot the other for rudeness? Would this not incite some to cry out "Fowl!!" or "Foul!!" ? Would this crying out then be considered rude? Would there have to be a rude court? Hmm. No, the rude would be shot so justice would not work for them.
Rats !! I suppose I am not really on to a great new law after all and those folks who are mad will have to calm themselves. Road rage is real though. There are many rude people. Shall we vote? All for a new law, Shoot the Rude, raise your hands. [ Mine are raised. ] BTW, why not vote to eliminate daylight savings time while we are voting? Raise your hands again. [ Mine are. ] OK, that was democracy in action and we shall come back to it with other grievances later.

Copyright 2007 by Robin Hall